How many times in your life have you done or said something that wasn’t perhaps the right thing to say or do to someone that you regretted afterwards? Have you ever wished that you were a better person? Have you ever wished that you could undo some harm you caused someone? Have you ever felt depressed and like you can’t seem to do anything right?
If you answered “yes” to any of the above questions, you are a basically good person! Truly mean people don’t ever feel bad about the trouble or upsets they cause … it’s always someone else’s fault and justified. So chin up!
The question is: How to get the good to outweigh the bad in your life?
How to tip the scale
As basically good people, we all have our own scale of good and bad built into us and no one can punish us or make us feel more guilty about wrong doings that we do to ourselves. Only you report to you inside.
There are people who go through the day bringing sunshine to everyone they talk to and make them happier for having interacted in some way. They admire something about you or do some small (or big) favour to help you out with something.
Other folks do volunteer work in their communities or help their neighbours who are perhaps older and need a hand with lawn mowing or snow removal. You get the idea.
Those are on-going actions on the “good” side of the scale. But how about when you do something right now that you feel bad or guilty about? What can you do to fix it right now?
For example:
I just said something to a friend, somewhat jokingly, that was a little bit mean and when I got off the phone, I was feeling guilty. What to do, what to do?
I decided that rather than bothering her with another phone call right away, I would text her and apologize for the comment. And further, I told her how amazing I think she is to get everything done in a day the way she does, and that I love having her as a friend.
Hopefully that will delete the little sting I gave her and show her how I REALLY feel about her and that I appreciate her.
Another example:
I once “borrowed” a magazine from the waiting room in an office to finish the article I started reading while waiting. Felt so guilty! The next day I returned it plus another fresh magazine. Felt much better!
The key to this scale
If you are way more busy doing the “right” things and taking care to help others, the occasional “bad” thing or slip-up can be made right quite quickly usually. This does not mean to go around being introverted all the time but, when you do slip up, quickly make it right with that person if you can, or do something for someone else that helps them.
It’s a scale! Do more good than bad and you’ll feel happier about yourself and your life. Don’t forget to do nice things for yourself too as you are a GOOD PERSON!
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